I deleted both of my Facebook accounts earlier this week. I had a good friend ask me why today. There were lots of reasons behind it. I was sick of having to reset my privacy settings every time they made a change. I was sick of sending messages and leaving comments on people's walls, trying to communicate with them, and having them ignore me. I was sick of feeling like I "should" friend certain people who don't even really talk to me in person. And I was sick of feeling left out when I kept reading about all the fun things people did with others that I wasn't invited to or was otherwise left out from. Well, this kind of over-simplifies my feelings.
I've always been a very sensitive and emotional person, and I know I sometimes overreact. I know that my overactive imagination doesn't help matters. I realized I wasn't happy with Facebook or on Facebook, and I didn't like the amount of time I spent on there looking for some kind of human connection. I guess I have gotten so used to the online human connections I've made over the years and have felt really close to many of my online friends, but I find that a lot of the online communication I have with my local friends and my family actually makes me feel more more distant from them unless it's used as a way to plan in-person events (which it sometimes was, but not always). Instead of having personal phone calls or email exchanges, it's like we all expect people to read about our lives on Facebook and/or blogs and think that is doing our duty as friends or family. It's sad, because it really takes away from the personalization and human connection that I really desire. So, I know that I'm going to reach out more to people in my life, and if they really want to be part of my life, they'll accept it when I reach out and do some reaching out as well.
3 comments:
I love facebook for some of the opposite reasons you left it: I feel far more in contact with extended family than I ever have.
With limited time, facebook has allowed me to maintain valuable relationships that I otherwise wouldn't have had.
At the same time, I don't friend people I don't like. I simply hit ignore, or if they friend me twice I'll make them a limited friend and then hide them from my view.
The key to facebook is you have to own facebook- it can't own you.
For a lot of us, sites like Farcebook are just about the only way to interact with friends so far away. You'll be missed.
But I'm with you on the privacy settings thing. I believe TPTB just won't give up trying to get around our settings and selling us out to advertisers. That aspect is getting old.
I definitely miss your comments and such! I totally get your point, though. I relate to much of what you said.
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