I just wrote and then deleted two blog entries on two different subjects instead of posting them. Why? Because they were terribly boring Debra-did-this, Debra-did-that. So you don't have to wonder why you wasted your time reading as much of the blog as you did before deleting it, I started over. You're welcome.
Instead, I decided to present the Ghost Sex Story (which I alluded to in a previous post). But a little background first.
I used to work at a cubicle next to someone from a small town in New Mexico. His mother still lived in that small town, and for kicks, she would send him links to their newspaper's online crime blotter. Sometimes reading those stories was downright funny and entertaining. I felt bad that some of the things going on were things the police actually had to deal with as part of their job duties.
And now where I live, I feel like I must live in a place that has some small-town feel. I get a paper delivered to our house 2 times a week. Reading the police crime blotter can be quite entertaining. Joe and I (or at least our house) were referred to in the paper twice, once in the crime blotter and once as a separate article (both dealing with theft/attempted theft).
But as I perused the paper at the end of the year, an article caught my eye. It was about the top stories of Federal Way in 2008. And one of the section headings caught my eye. So here it is, unedited, from the Federal Way Mirror, without further ado:
Ghost Sex (April 19)
The following is a sample from the Federal Way police public information log:
At 4:02 p.m. April 10, two women went into the Federal Way police station claiming that over the past two years, a paranormal person has been placing sensors on their bodies and visiting them in their house at 28600 block of 25th Place South.
They said that the ghost has been having sexual intercourse with them. One woman said that these incidents started in Kent and continued when she moved here. The other woman said that this just started now.
Reading stories like that make me miss my job working with adults with serious mental illnesses. I heard some great stories then, but usually there wasn't a second person to give merit to the tale.
I wonder if the ghost prefers a certain sexual position. I wonder if the ghost engages in foreplay. I wonder if the ghost makes any faces or noises. And I wonder if the ghost does house calls.